FUNNY : 18

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Do u remember the day we travelled in a car? I put my
dog out of the window, u put ur face out, then
people started shouting 'TWINS TWINS'




Tip to reduce alcohol consumption: Before marriage
drink only on the days when u r sad, after marriage
drink only on days when u r Happy!




Yamraj ne ek ladke ki jaan le li. Chitragupt- Is ko
waqt se pehle kyon mara?
Yumraj: Kya karun, March end mein target jo pura
karna tha.




Kunwaro se log puchte hai ki tumhari ab tak shaadi
kyon nahi huye?Kunware bhi jor se kahte hai: Jaako
rakhe sayeean mar sake na koi.




Boy: Ki mein tera hath chum sakda han"
Girl: Kyon Haramjadeya mere bullan te koi kande
lagge ne ?




What's the diff between Dava &d Daru?
Dava is like girlfriend, that comes with expiry
date and Daru is like 
wife, Jitni purani hogi utna sir chad ke bolegi.




I just bought a used car. It's a convertible. You
turn the key, and 
it converts into a piece of crap. -Scott E. Roeben




Three dreams of a man: To be as handsome as his
mother thinks. 
To be as rich as his child believes. To have as
many women as his 
wife suspects




Sorry recharge khatam ho gaya. Galfriend ko I luv
u bolna hai or recharge khatam. Ab kya kare? Mein
batata hoon kya karein. Theke pe jao, quarter lo,
4 peg maro or g/f k ghar k bahar khade ho k jor se 
chilaao I Luv U. Kabootar mehenga pad jaayega.
Rum ka Paua ab
 sirf 10 RS mein.




Mallika went to a swimming pool in a BRA & PANTY.
Guard: Madam here 2 piece costume is not allowed!
Mallika: Kaun sa utaroon?




Always start your day with a lot of S E X
S-mile
E-nergy
X-citement
so make SEX a daily habit, & u'll always be
SMILING!




Do you know the difference between a pun and
a fart?
A pun is a sudden shift of wit!




A Chinese couple Mr & Miss Hua got twins without
marriage. What 
did they named them?
They named them as 'Jo-Jua', 'So-Hua'




Wife ko Begum kyon kehte hain?
Kyonki shaadi ke baad saare gum to husband ke hisse
mein aate hain 
or wife Be-Gum ho jaat hai.




What did Tarzan think when he saw a dead Cheetah?
Wow! New Underwear.


rue relatives always stand behind u during bad times.
Check ur marriage
album. All ur relatives were standing behind u!




Commerce joke: Do u know y in a couple's photo man
is on the right side
 & woman on the left?
Because as per balance sheet liabilities are on left
side and assets 
on right!




Girl anounced her engagement. Father: Does this
fellow have any money?
Girl: Oh! Daddy, U men are all alike, that's exactly
what he asked 
me about you!


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